colddeadqueer

Latest Posts by colddeadqueer

This video is how I imagine Baz like in Ban’s Twist and Shout. I’m still not ready to accept the fact that it’ll never be completed 💔

♥️🧡💛💚💙💜

no matter your gender it’s gay to be attracted to me I don’t make the rules

How every Snowbaz fanfic reads like to me and I eat it up every time.

happy pride month everyone

life been feeling a lot less „i’m living a charmed life” and a lot more „all i do is lose” lately

to be perfectly honest. i don't care if it is cheesy or cliched or idealistic. i like stories where the core of it is about kindness, the warmth we can offer others and the gentleness we receive in return. maybe the moral of the story IS love triumphs. it better fucking be

Have you been Baz? 😂😂 I forgot the inside :P

ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ

WIP Wednesday

2025.05.28 - 2025.06.04

A collection of the WIP fics that have posted in the last week.

Hapless Supernova [M, 13/?] by BBirdy, @theearlgreymage / EarlGreyMage

Rising at Dawn [T, 7/?] by iamwheretheseasleeps

They Get Married. [E, 5/12 ] by @colddeadqueer / colddeadqueer

I think as someone with OCD I relate to Baz so much because in many ways vampirism is similar to OCD.

Having intrusive thoughts about hurting others despite it being very upsetting?

Being ashamed of having those thoughts because no one understands and will shun you?

Having compulsions (drinking blood) you hide from others that only temporarily quells those thoughts?

Hating yourself for these thoughts and thinking it makes you evil?

Isolating yourself from others so they don’t find out that you’re a monster?

Ultimately those thoughts do not making you a monster because you are not your thoughts, and it doesn’t mean you actually want to act on them?

I originally wasn’t going to have Dev & Niall get together in “They Get Married.” because it’s canon-compliant I didn’t think they realistically would in canon. But then I remembered it’s my fic and I have free will, so I did it anyway 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏳️‍🌈✨

They Get Married. Chapter 5: The Stag Party.

Summary: Stag Party in Margate! Baz and Simon deal with some of the more realistic parts of sex, Dev’s acting weird, and Baz experiments with fashion.

This chapter was so fun to write, I hope you enjoy it! Happy Pride! 🏳️‍🌈

“We are who we know ourselves to be, and we are what we love.”

WE LOVE YOU PEDRO

yo ho homosexual

happy pride month queers

“I was eleven years old, and I’d lost my mother, and my soul, and the Crucible gave me you.”

—Baz Pitch, Carry On, Epilogue, pg. 506

Six-Sentence Sunday

This is from chapter 5 of They Get Married, which will be published today or tomorrow! Dev reveals some interesting information at the stag party…

“Dev, thinking about kissing your male friends is bloody well gay,” I say.

“No it isn’t!” Dev argues. “Everyone thinks about kissing their mates sometimes.”

I’m speechless. What the fuck?

“Like, you don’t actually wanna kiss your mate because you’re not gay. But you think about it sometimes, like if you were both hammered.”

Anybody else got that Evergiven sized writers block

What is it?? A plane?? A bird?? No, it's my homemade Simon Snow trilogy poster

If y'all like my work pleaaaseee follow me on instagram and tiktok, get me out of the flop era 😭

when they get married who cries harder

not related to my usual posts BUT. I just graduated from university today with high honors! :D

AO3 Stats & Notifications

One (1) person said this would be interesting so here's a post about what AO3 authors can see about their works and what they get notified for.

What authors get notified for:

comment on a fic

EDIT on a comment (some of u edit like 16 times and it is very sweet. I get an email every time)

Response to a comment

Request to join a collection (note: don't do this. collection owners have a lot of power over fic and should only be used for specific reasons and not to create a collection of fic you enjoy. that's what bookmark collections are for)

Gift

Related work notification

Daily kudos email. The daily kudos email shows all the kudos of the previous day in an order that makes sense to the ao3 database and not to human eyes.

The only bit of this that is clickable is the title of the fic. I can click into the profile of a nice user if I navigate to the fic and then go to the bottom where the kudos are displayed.

Things authors do not get notified for:

subscription to a fic or author

ending a subscription

deleting a comment

creating a bookmark

a fic view (if you visit a fic twenty times, no one knows that but your isp and your browser history and you)

Now here's what authors can see about their fic under the cut because more screenshots

The first thing an author can see is something everyone can see, and that's who left a public bookmark

If you click on the number next to bookmarks you can see this. And each username is clickable to see the other things they have bookmarked or written (side note, this is the best way to find other fic to read)

The author can also see the note a reader leaves on a public bookmark.

Please note that authors don't get a notification for this and I don't look at them (screenshot proving me a liar) so you aren't guaranteed to be seen by the author. If you like that last nice user want the author to know it stuck with them, you gotta leave a comment.

But there are also private bookmarks! And private bookmarks are, as the name sounds like, private. However. On the statistics page for each fic the author gets a little more information.

Here is the statistics page:

This can be selected to by year and the numbers will change EXCEPT user subscriptions. User subscriptions shows the current state of subscriptions. And since authors don't get a notification of number go up or down, they won't know when it's changed unless they are tracking it. Additionally there is no way to see who has subscribed. So you can subscribe to whoever you like or unsubscribe at any time and that is between you, the ao3 database, your ISP tracking your history, and your email client. But the author doesn't know. You are released from any social obligation to stay subscribed or any embarrassment you might have. Go forth.

See? Here is 2024 and it has the same number of users.

Also fun fact, the word count shows fic FINISHED in that year. I wrote a 90k fic that straddled 2024 and 2025 and the full word count for that is tracked on the 2025 page.

anyway back to info.

I can scroll down on this and get a bit more information on each fic.

Here I can see the number of people who have subscribed to a fic - but not who they are. I can also see the TOTAL NUMBER of bookmarks including private bookmarks.

Compare contrast:

The public listing shows 47 bookmarks, the statistics page listing shows 127. On average, most fics have about half of their bookmarks private.

I can't see who made those extra bookmarks, just that they exist.

Also on the statistics page the comments are shown as the number of threads instead of the total number. I always reply to comments so the thread count is a more accurate reflection of how many people left a comment.

So to sum up, what authors can see if they investigate:

username on a public bookmark and any note left

the total number of bookmarks

the total number of subscriptions to themselves right now

the number of subscriptions on a fic

hits

“He still looks like something I want to eat.”

ThWIP Thursday (sorry!)

2025.04.23 - 2024.05.01

A collection of the WIP fics that have posted in the last week.

Beautiful Roaring Scream [E, 1/6] by @rimeswithpurple / RimesWithPurple

A Change Would Do You Good* [T, 3/?] by Dumb_Bitch_Writes

Distance* [T, 4/?] by CRML

Do you miss us? [T, 10/11] by Magicaleigh

fin de siècle. [T, 6/7] by @ninemagicks / NineMagicks

For That Stolen Heart [T, 15/?] by Loserlovely

Hapless Supernova [M, 9/?] by BBirdy, @theearlgreymage / EarlGreyMage

In Sickness and In Baz [NR, 4/10] by TaylorSims

Picket Fence Is Sharp As Knives [E, 8/?] by @prettygoododds / PrettyGoodOdds

Right Where You Left Me [M, 5/?] by @waywardlesbian / waywardlesbian

Rising at Dawn [T, 5/?] by iamwheretheseasleeps

The Salisbury Boy [E, 8/20] by @alleycat0306 / alleycat0306

They Get Married. [E, 4/12 ] by @colddeadqueer / colddeadqueer

*Multiple chapters posted this week.

Carry on Through the Ages fics.

I was talking to my friend who isn’t familiar with CO about Baz and I said “on all levels except physical I am him,” and then showed her the cover art of WS. She, without hesitation, said “all levels including physical, you look like him” and it made me so stupidly happy my life feels complete.

The LGBTQ community has seen controversy regarding acceptance of different groups (bisexual and transgender individuals have sometimes been marginalized by the larger community), but the term LGBT has been a positive symbol of inclusion and reflects the embrace of different identities and that we’re stronger together and need each other. While there are differences, we all face many of the same challenges from broader society.

In the 1960′s, in wider society the meaning of the word gay transitioned from ‘happy’ or ‘carefree’ to predominantly mean ‘homosexual’ and was an umbrella term that meant anyone who wasn’t cisgender or heterosexual. The community embraced the word ‘gay’ as a mark of pride.

The modern fight for queer rights is considered to have begun with The Stonewall Riots in 1969 and was called the Gay Liberation Movement and the Gay Rights Movement.

The acronym GLB surfaced around this time to also include Lesbian and Bisexual people who felt “gay” wasn’t inclusive of their identities. 

Early in the gay rights movement, gay men were largely the ones running the show and there was a focus on men’s issues. Lesbians were unhappy that gay men dominated the leadership and ignored their needs and the feminist fight. As a result, lesbians tended to focus their attention on the Women’s Rights Movement which was happening at the same time. This dominance by gay men was seen as yet one more example of patriarchy and sexism. 

In the 1970′s, sexism and homophobia existed in more virulent forms and those biases against lesbians also made it hard for them to find their voices within women’s liberation movements. Betty Friedman, the founder of the National Organization for Women (NOW), commented that lesbians were a “lavender menace” that threatened the political efficacy of the organization and of feminism and many women felt including lesbians was a detriment.

In the 80s and 90s, a huge portion of gay men were suffering from AIDS while the lesbian community was largely unaffected. Lesbians helped gay men with medical care and were a massive part of the activism surrounding the gay community and AIDS. This willingness to support gay men in their time of need sparked a closer, more supportive relationship between both groups, and the gay community became more receptive to feminist ideals and goals. 

Approaching the 1990′s it was clear that GLB referred to sexual identity and wasn’t inclusive of gender identity and T should be added, especially since trans activist have long been at the forefront of the community’s fight for rights and acceptance, from Stonewall onward. Some argued that T should not be added, but many gay, lesbian and bisexual people pointed out that they also transgress established gender norms and therefore the GLB acronym should include gender identities and they pushed to include T in the acronym. 

GLBT became LGBT as a way to honor the tremendous work the lesbian community did during the AIDS crisis. 

Towards the end of the 1990s and into the 2000s, movements took place to add additional letters to the acronym to recognize Intersex, Asexual, Aromantic, Agender, and others. As the acronym grew to LGBTIQ, LGBTQIA, LGBTQIAA, many complained this was becoming unwieldy and started using a ‘+’ to show LGBT aren’t the only identities in the community and this became more common, whether as LGBT+ or LGBTQ+. 

In the 2010′s, the process of reclaiming the word “queer” that began in the 1980′s was largely accomplished. In the 2020′s the LGBTQ+ acronym is used less often as Queer is becoming the more common term to represent the community. 

“They Get Married.” Chapter 4: The Invitations

it’s my birthday!

And in honor of my birthday, Chapter 4 of “They Get Married.” is now posted! It would be a wonderful birthday present if you gave it a read ;)

Summary: Dev and Niall make an appearance, Fiona tells Malcolm off, and Simon and Baz take a break from wedding planning to celebrate Simon’s birthday (featuring some erotic cooking).

Shoutout to @musicallychaos for being my beta!

READ CHAPTER 4 HERE!